


Whenever I'm around you, I bite my tongue

by Trickster_iron



Series: yuzusho prompts [3]
Category: Figure Skating RPF
Genre: Angst?, Friendship, Idiots in Love, Light Angst, M/M, Mutual Pining, Shoma Uno & Nathan Chen & Boyang Jin
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-25
Updated: 2019-07-25
Packaged: 2020-07-19 10:35:15
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 748
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19972654
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Trickster_iron/pseuds/Trickster_iron
Summary: They keep their feelings silent, not thinking that the other feels the same way.





	Whenever I'm around you, I bite my tongue

**Author's Note:**

> Another short one! Yay! (?) and as previously stated, most of my fics were written before Saitama, in this case, before GPF 2019, so I had to edit it a little bit lol I hope you like it!  
> Inspired by the prompt of the title!  
> No beta because it's short xD

_I love you, but I shouldn’t_

Shoma was laughing, his eyes shining and cheeks hurting from smiling so much but he couldn’t help it. It was the first time Yuzuru and he were together after Heroes and Future in Nagano, finally competing together and laughing during the Worlds 2019, in Saitama and the younger never felt more complete.

To watch the older’s skate, happy and free from the burden of being the Hope of Tohoku, finally skating the way he wanted to, and it was breath taking. It was practice time before the short program and they were playing around, and practicing their jumps of course, but the excitement he felt at finally having the Olympic Champion by his side was too much. He jumped a quad flip with a smile on his face, breaking character but with a steady landing.

“Wow! That was a great jump Sho!” Yuzu was smiling, and he answered with a shy one.

“Thanks, but I still have a lot to work on.” The older shook his head and ruffled his hair. A shiver ran through his back.

Shoma wanted to tell him, every time they were together, how deep his feelings for him went, how his smile lit up his world and how much he wanted him to stay by his side, but he couldn’t, it wasn’t his place, Yuzuru deserved better, not someone who couldn’t win in his hometown, not someone who still had a long way to go to stand next to him.

The younger skater gulped, trying to ease the lump in his throat and keep his smile. ‘Fake it until you make it’ had more meanings than one.

_You are so beautiful, but you are not mine._

Yuzuru felt happy, there was a lightness to his skating and his heart felt overjoyed, happy to finally be back on the ice, on an international competition and the Final. So different from last year, in which he had watched the final in Nagoya, desperate and frustrated because he couldn’t be there, the same feeling of impotence he felt during Worlds, for not being able to hug Sho after losing the gold.

But now he was there, next to the younger, playing around and sticking to him, touching him as he was depraved and enjoying his warmth. He loved the feeling of having the skater in his arms, laughing and happy. He would squeeze him, tight, wanting to convey everything he couldn’t say for fear, hoping his feelings reached him and he would know, when he looked up with those bright and big brown eyes.

Shoma was beautiful, no matter what he did, he was gorgeous, a sight to behold. His laughter was wonderful, sending a bunch of butterflies flying in his stomach and whenever the younger’s eyes were on him, watching him, his heart felt like it was going to burst.

Too many times he came closer to blurting out his feelings, during shared nights in their hotel rooms playing a videogame or goofing around the ice and the two twirling around like an ice dance couple. He always laughed hard during those moments and then he would feel the need, to hug him and kiss him, to tell him how much he loved him, wanting to hear the other say the same.

He just wanted to be close, closer than anyone, hold him and never let him go.

Shoma finished his Stairway to Heaven run through, powerful and amazing, he wanted to skate to him to congratulate him but before he could move, Boyang and Nathan ambushed him. The Chinese clinging to his back and the American steadying him after the impact, grabbing his hands in front of him. The three laughed and the reigning silver medallist looked so alive and bright, squealing when, still trapped in Boyang’s embrace, Nate tickled him, eliciting more breathless laughter.

Yuzuru tried to reign in his emotions, feeling fire running through his veins. They were friends, he knew but Nathan and Boyang were there, the whole season before the Olympics, the three got closer, almost inseparable now during competitions. And he should be grateful, Shoma hadn’t been alone and he has great friends because the sQuad came together, and he hated himself for thinking it but…

But he wanted to be the only one to elicit that kind of laughter, that kind of shine from the younger. Shoma wasn’t his and it killed him to know he had been replaced in his life.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading! Your kudos and comments are very appreciated! <3 have a great day!


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